Pens can't solve Caps

Nothing exciting happens until Boyd Gordan is called for tripping. Our PP apparently went out to lunch. Brooks Laich draws a holding penalty on Whitters. Laich and Fedo exchange some shoves. 4-on-4 hockey. Then the penalty to Gordan expires and Ovechkin scores. Gonch took a great shot but a Caps defenseman drops to block it. Geno had an incredible chance but Jose Thedore made the save. Idiot Alex Semin does something useful for once and is called for tripping. Gonch had another great opportunity but Theodore somehow got a piece of it. PP hasn’t returned from lunch yet: Staalsy is called for some joke penalty. Theodore came way out of the crease to block Eaton’s shot and Max Talbot hits the rebound home. Before Pens fans could even celebrate, Alex Semin beats Fleury. Puke. Then Maxie is called for boarding. Ovechkin’s drive was denied by Flower. Then Sid went shorthanded but shot a muffin. Geno and Staalsy go shorthanded but Geno decides to pass instead of shoot. Penalty killed. TK had a great chance but Theodore gloves it. Geno was pounded by Nickolas Backstrom. But its Brashear that takes the hooking penalty.

Before Pens fans can even settle down on their couches, Sergei Fedorov slaps one past Fleury. John Erskine is called for interference on Duper. The Penguins need to capitalize on this PP or the momentum stands a slim chance to turn around. The Caps have too many men on the ice: Ovechkin serves the penalty. About a minute of 5-on-3 for the Pens. Caps have a shorthanded chance but Flower is there. Then Gonch blows one past Theodore. Ovechkin grabs the puck and almost gets his second goal in the game but Flower says NO. Sykie has a quality chance but Theodore made a great save. Flower answers with another incredible save on Ovechkin. The play was great and fast and all of a sudden something happens and out of nowhere there’s another Capital goal. The announcers rag on Flower for a couple minutes. And then he lets another one in. Let’s try Garon in goal, mkay? Yep, Mathieu Garon playing only his second time in a Pens sweater. The Penguins need more offense. Now would be nice. Coincidental slashing minors were doled out to Semin and Orpik to make it 4-on-4 hockey. Sid hits Ovechkin cleanly by the Caps bench and then Ovechkin roughs Sid. Prediction: AO and Cookie/Maxie get physical next period.

The Pens start off the period in the Caps zone. Gonch has a great chance from the center point, but Theodore was there. The Caps pound Garon with shots. Tom Poti is called for elbowing. Whitters shovels one at Theodore but he makes the save of his life to keep it out. Satan slaps the puck at the net but it was wide. Bylsma is not looking happy. The Penguins PP is lackluster: they are 1 for 6 on the day. Fedorov is called for holding, so the Pens are on the PP again. Sid had a great shot but it went just over the net. Satan shoots another one wide. Ovechkin goes into the zone with Scudsie in hot pursuit. Scuds makes a diving play to get the puck off his stick: incredible. Mike Green hammers one toward the net and hits Whitters right in the side of the face. He gets to the bench and is looked over by the medical staff. JStaal failed on a play and angrily breaks his stick on his way to the bench. Whitters is back out, and is hit by Donald Brashear. Godard exchanges words with Brashear. Shaone Morrisonn is called for tripping and Pens on the PP. Alex Semin and Nicklas Backstrom go 2-on-1, but Garon saves it. The last three minutes are vomit.

THOUGHTS:

--Garon let in 0 goals: nice...hmmm

--Penguins PP is gross.

--Maxie showed up big time but had no help.

--Gonch is incredible, but he also had no help.

Islanders Wednesday.

Let's not get embarrassed again.

Do it.

LET'S GO PENS!!!